Restless

So I am sitting at work, doing my tasks, getting things done and all that’s on my mind is how I don’t know what I want to do in life. 

Sure this job is great, but it’s not something I want to do forever. I’m getting restless and aggravated over the littlest things. I feel trapped and desperately wish that I could take a year and soul search. 

A Bachelor’s in creative writing should mean endless opportunities, so how come when looking for jobs most of them are for teaching or medical content writing? Neither of which I am interested in. To quote Belle, “I want adventure in the great wide somewhere!” I don’t want to be stuck at an office job the rest of my life either. 

I’ve considering applying for a job that pays you to travel and write about the new cities you discover for a year, but I have so many things tying me down here. I’m 29 and still lost at what I want to be when I grow up. Should I have taken school more serious back in high school instead of living in a fantasy world of being a star one Broadway or a dancer for a pop star?  Should I have tried harder to make that come true? My friends know that I’m a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, so maybe that didn’t happen because I’m not meant to perform. Teaching dance is great, but even that I’m not sure I want to do forever anymore. 

Right now I just think my spirit is broken and I’m in one of those tall ditches that seem impossible to get out of. It’s like I’m waiting for some kind of sign to say “hey here is what you are meant to do, now do it!” Honestly, I hope I figure it out soon. I’m not looking for handouts because I’ve always worked for what I’ve gotten, but any sign that shoves me in the right direction I am open to welcoming.  That’s all for now. 

-AMP

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Author: myampedlife

I'm just a millennial trying to get through this thing called life. Dancer. Writer.

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